Fingers crossed for mum

Well back in January my dear mum was supposed to be having her hip replacement operation.
Shes been in excruciating pain for years now. On top of two worn out hips her  spine vertebrae are crumbling, and we were  told right back in 1988 they can't pin it as its too far  gone.
So i accompanied her to her pre operation checks and 'joint school' as well. A good 3 hours worth of how the operation will be, how you cant put your hands below your knees, twist your body, how you have to take  tiny tiny 'penguin feet'shuffles to move or you risk dislocating the new hip.
We were told all the erercises she would need to do.
But  a routine test came back that dashed all mums  hopes. She had crystilisation and a bladder infection. Despite no symptoms, her numbers were sky high, so the consultant refused to operate.

Since then she has had 5 courses of 5-7 day antibiotics. All the courses were back to back. She even was told to stop all  her herbal pills (glucosomine, garlic, chrondroitin, calcium) and to start taking cranberry so she did that.
Still no sucess. After each course she had to send in a pee sample and wait a few days until the  dreaded phone calls came.  A few times the snooty doctors receptionist 'forgot' to tell mum for 4 days that she had just been perscribed an emergency course of antibiotics.
So she has worked her way through different antibiotics each time. The last lot was very unusual according to  our local chemist and had to be tracked down and ordered  in.
This last lot left mum with really bad pains, within  30 minutes of taking them.
But when she phoned up the doctors the other day the results  come back as the levels had now dropped from 500 something down to 123 something, and no further action was required.
So fingers very  firmly crossed that she now gets to go back on the waiting list for her hip replacement operation.
It really stressed her out as they were talking about referring her to urologists etc and she got worried incase it was cancer

So fingers crossed, but now the poor sausage has gone down with a bad cold/flu and its gone to her chest. I guess the way shes barking it will be back to the doctors again for more antibiotics. Shes only just been 'well enough' to get up today and its 4.39pm!


my poor mum doesnt deserve this, shes such a sweet kind lady, i only have to mention someone i know from a forum is having a baby and shes got her knitting needles out for someone she doesnt know, or the same with my reborns too.

my dear mummy

A poem

Warning a poem i wrote a while ago. Some feelings there so dont read if you are easily upset.



How hard is it to be a mum?

How hard is it to be a mum?

Crying, teething and smelly bum

How hard is it when they fail

dont pass their sogs test

and they're labelled slower than the rest

Yet you're trying your best!


How hard is it when you just want to scream

to cry,

to curl up in a ball exhail your last breath

and die.


How hard is it to forgive

those who really dont fully understand

but label her hard work and you've too much in your hands


How hard is it when you are so sad

and crying non stop

empty and hollow to the core

when you just want to yell "No flippin more!


How hard is it when the laundry so new

has been kicked round the floor

for the 90th time

and thats before its met the dryer, radiator or washing line

How much does it hurt to be labelled dirty child

yet trying to clean it all up constantly has driven you wild

you've washed and scrubbed till your hands are sore

whilst fantasising about walking out the door

And never coming back any more,


your marriage is in tatters

your lover? your best friend? i dont know anymore

My energy is gone, happiness sunk to the floor?


If i went missing would they care?

my whole life in front of them now laid bare.

"see i told you so!" they would say

"Mentally unstable in a big way"


Do i stay or do i go?

Will my image end up on the local news show?

If i died would they cry? feel any guilt? or wonder why?

And now they are saying my other blessings were also so bad

Ive tried my best, read every book i had.



So how hard is it to be a mummy

i ask myself every day,

i love my kids, but should i stay?

walk another dragging mile in these shoes

as they once again hammer down my throat, their rules



So how hard is it to be a mummy?

Harder than crawling backwards a hundred yards,

...... a mile

But gotta keep on fighting for just one more magical, innocent smile! :)

New Hair Do's!

Mum and i both had very long hair. We decided it was time for a change.

The other day i wheeled mum in her wheelie (wheelchair) or her  pushchair as my boys call it, into a 'salon'  we hadnt been to before.

The decor was interesting.... eg seriously out dated!
The 20+ seats were all empty. We were the only people there. As was the ladies bookings diary (bad sign....)

The 'hair dresser' i use that term loosely was a grumpy oldish lady who couldnt even force a fake smile. First thing she grumbled at me was "Take yer muffa's coooat aff!"
So  i helped my 'muffa' to get her coat off and wheeled her into position.

Lady then begins cutting. 3 words... Oh My God!!!
It  was the roughest quickest SNIP SNIP anyone could have done. Seriously im not kidding garden trimmers would have been better.

Mums blood was starting to boil i could see it. But not liking to complain we left said  grumpy lady £6.50  better off, to her empty  salon.

Mums hair wasnt the slightest bit strait, one huge long bit not  even trimmed.
My boys could have done better with safety play scissors lol.

So we managed to book in with our  usual hair dresser. We are not one for hair cuts very often maybe once or twice a year lol. Im not a pampering person for salons etc.
But off we went.
I had my hair cut by Shona the middle aged lady complete with bump... Where did that come from? lol. *Debs needs a birds and bees talk again*
Shona by the way is craving beetroot with everything even with cake and custard!!

Mum had her hair cut by the younger lady who is Shona's sister in law. A lovely lady who has the most funkiest hair spikes and colours each time we go there:)

I must be having some sort of nearly 35 midlife crisis as i keep contemplating a shade of metalic purple  ive seen i supermarket hair dye kits....
but for now this is me! eek! with my new 'do'
Fat face alert! Yuk!:

and this is my mum with my Son Austin who was 3 on the 29th. I think my mum looks fab for almost 68!!

10 things i tell myself

Ive just been tagged by my lovely friend Lucy xx
http://leopardprintmommy.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/10-things-i-tell-myself-every-day-meme.html

So here are my  10 things  i tell myself each day

1/ I can start the rest of the decorating tomorrow...

2/ One  day he might actually load the washing machine properly (why do men never seem to be able to pull out tucked up sleeves lol)

3/ I am very blessed with some lovely online friends :)

4/ Id better start tidying up again. Will the house ever be tidy?!

5/ Cant tidy need to get on with the rooting lol

6/ Stop obsessing over garlic bulbs and growing veggies.... will it be a sucess?... or a flop?! And yes i can live without a wormery! what ever next?!!!

7/ I do love my hubby really?!

8/ Marriage does have its 'up' and not just its 'downs' doesnt it?

9/ Im not broody... im not broody... pull yer self together woman you have 4  kids, 5 and under.... ok twins would be nice.... im not broody..... i couldnt have an odd number of kids could i eg 3 girls 2 boys or vice versa so id better have 1 more of each...... im not broody.... pull  yourself together you cant order a specific gender and i love my boys the same as i love my girls so 2 more boys or 2  more girls would be ok..... i have enough to do as it is, so no more babies.... if i tell myself often enough i might start beliveing it.... I AM NOT BROODY!!! repeat it 10 times as some sort of chant!

10/ Get  back on with the looseing weight lark.... time is flying by!!!

lol!

Sewing

Im getting the sewing bug again.
I love collecting sewing patterns especially if they are for sewn bags/handbags/aprons/children & baby clothes/doll clothes.

Ebay is my friend when it comes to buying patterns lol.

This was one of my last projects its a fold up chaning mat bag for my  baby daughter Brynlee.
I  use it when we go to baby clinic weigh and play  sessions. It holds some nappies, wipes and her red weighing in book nicely.
It says 'Lil Princess' on it, well  she  was born on William and Kates Wedding day after all lol.

Im quite pleased with it :)

Veggie growing virgin

Well im pretty  much  a virgin at veggie growing but i think im going to give it a go!

I think it will get the kids interested esecially as they watch  mr blooms nursery on kids tv.
First thing on the list to try is garlic! Apparently 'Solent Wight' is the variety i need.
We have got a load of  old car tyres we are going to line up, either  1,2 or 3 tyres high depending  on what vegetable it is.

I need to get some garlic seed bulbs, carefully split the cloves apart, then plant them pointy end up spaced apart. This month is the month to plant them so thats lucky.

Then when they are grown we will need to harvest them all, and tie them all up to dry out. I can then  use  some of those for next years crop.

Also going to attempt to grow lettuice potatoes maybe, spring onions, radishes etc!

This could either be a  great new adventure or a disaster lol!

A trip down memory lane

Today inspired by a friends email. I took a but  of trip down memory lane via some of my facebook and photobucket albums.

I just thought id share some pictures...

This was me as a baby, back in 1977:
With my daddy RIP xx

Loving the 70's wallpaper! lol

Playing with my dads new tool box one Christmas

Me  in my teenage years, i wasnt so fat then. Age 15.

This was  before i was almost blinded in a shooting incident.

One day when im up to it i'll blog about it, but basically a teenage boy thought it would be funny to shoot at me with an air rifle in the face.

Not being dramatic but that day changed my life. All the kids in school  thought it was funny to shout 'bang' at me, kids being kids! I got quite badly bullied through no fault of my own, and stopped working at the riding stables soon after that, and gained a ton of weight.  Something i still struggle with these days. One day i will  be thinner again, i will get there i have to! I cant let all this beat me for the rest of my life!

A much happier event! 4 generations. 2 of my 4 wee ones, me when i was blonde, my mum and my nanna :)

Our house where we live now when we first bought it. It had no electricity or sewerage, water was just an outside  tap!! My mum, dad and i renoated it ourselves. Its still work in  progress in some aspects, work slowed down after my dad passed away back in 2004. My mum is disabled, so hubby and i have been doing it as and when we can! Its not as bad as this now though lol!

Weird fact about us an houses....

Our old house in Wales... the couple we sold the house to the husband ended up  murdering his wife years later, eek!

Our house in Lincolnshire.... someone hung themselves in the house years before we bought it.

This house now... The person who owned it went after the neighbour to shoot them.

All  that  is weird what  with that and me getting shot, as we actually live in a very safe area which is realively crime free. You can go out for the day and leave keys in your  car, your door unlocked etc! Not that im suggesting it, but nothing happens if you do!

Me and hubby when we first met for real. We were penpals, and after a year or so he came up from Peterborough to Scotland to meet me for real. He was that nervous and  shy that he never spoke more than 6 words in the first 3 or 4 hours lol!

He worked quick though as he proposed to me on day 2!

This was a couple of days after he arrived, before going on a night out

We have been married 11 years in August.

I would love to renew our vows sometime in the next year or two.

More pictures later...